Aisya's View Of Life

Baru saja menjengah Blog kawan yang dah lama sangat tak kunjung. Rasa macam lama betul tak baca blog orang lain. Masa..Masa... Susah nak cari masa nak melawat blog rakan-rakan. Anyway, blog kawan saya ni yang menjadi inspirasi untuk saya menulis entri pada kali ini dan saya dalam mode berani mati ni dengan hendak kembali melampiaskan perasaan saya dalam blog. Sedangkan saya sudah berjanji dengan diri sendiri untuk tidak meluahkan apa-apa berkenaan hati dalam blog ini lagi! But then, what the hell!!!! right? So here goes nothing. Pada tanggal 4 Januari 2012, baru 4 hari menjengah tahun baru....Ooo, yup! HAPPY NEW YEAR PEEPS , almost forgot...hahaha...Anyway, continue... Ok, so pada tanggal tersebut saya telah dikejutkan dengan satu gambar ni, yang terlihat dari news feed dalam Facebook. The guy I admire most got enganged with a very cute girl I can say. Hurmmm, perasaan masa tengok gambar tu bercampur-baur actually. Sad, happy, ponder ... macam-macamlah. But anyhow, after that I f...

Wow, its been a while... Looking at my little chat box, many people already visited my blog. Thanks a bunch people!!  I cant find time to write, that's why I have a very big gap between each entry. Anyhow, I would love to share something with you all today. Love is a very great feeling that can come to one life. I couldn't agree more but of course this only apply to those who get the pure and real love. As for my case, still looking and keep looking (^^, Along the way, I found a lot of different people. It's like a journey to know someone. Observe them, how they act, how they says thing. Sometime its also happened when we see the great side of someone but then cannot work out because of certain reason. We stop and continue with our journey to find the perfect one. Well at least, someone we can consider match with us. Okay, Perfection is a big word. No one Perfect. I got that but what I meant from this term of perfect is, someone you been dreaming for, the type o...

...dalam diri seorang lelaki Bukannya kacak, bukannya tampan Tapi biarlah di dalam hati ada taman Bukan senda bukan gurauan Tapi memang itu kenyataan Sahabat, kekasih, pelindung dan 'soulmate' Imam, penasihat, juga peng'update' Suka mendengar, bertutur dan memberi komen Tapi bukan pula macam 'judge American Idol', Simon. Dalam berbicara, ada tawa hingga menampakkan baris gigi Dalam ketegangan, ada pujukan pelembut hati Bijak menegur hingga tidak menyakitkan walau seribu kali dengar pun, 'i don't mind' Indah sungguh bila direnung, penyejuk sang mata dan hati Sinar iman sentiasa menghiasi, tak jemu pandang berkali-kali Bila tiada cukup terasa, seakan dunia gelap seketika Nasihatmu sentiasa terpelihara, semoga kekal sehingga ke Syurga Heee....Terjiwang seketika...tapi tak pe kan??? ummmmmm~ *sambil memain2kan jari di keyboard =p Till Then, -ToOdLeZ-

Dah sampai di Kuala Lumpur dari Pulau Pinang. Sangat teruja sebab nak jumpa kawan-kawan. Nak melakukan aktiviti2 yang pernah dibuat bersama. Kelmarin pergi Serdang jumpa nyang tiri aku, tak beraya lagi dengan dia...So pergilah melawat dia kat sana. The only granny I have. So, rasa macam nak jengok selalu tu ada sebab aku tak pernah ada peluang berbuat demikian dengan tok dan nek aku dulu =( Dalam perjalanan ke sana lalulah tepi UPM. Tak taulah kenapa aku rasa sangat belong there. Maybe because aku study kat sana, 3 tahun kat sana tapi perasaan ni tak macam aku di KPTM dulu. Rasa sedih lalu sekitar ladang. Masa nak pegi amik jubah ari Sabtu aritu masuk main gate pun rasa cam sangat sayu, kenapa nak emosi ni? Tapi bila bercakap pasal bekerja di KL, aku jadi macam acuh tak acuh. Aku rasa i dont belong here. Tak taulah, nak kata aku tak biasa keadaan kat KL ni aku spent my teenage life kat sini kowt ... Sedikit sejarah aku, aku stay di Penang sampai aku form 2 je, itu pun setengah tahun. A...

An akward feeling actually bila dengar lagu ni ... Setelah layan satu lagu Maher Zain which aku dah post pun kat blog aku ni ... This one is the other song yg aku jumpa di dalam youtube ... Ok! Kalau siapa yang ada FB aku and accidentally checking on them everytime you open yours, aku ada post jugak lagu ni kat sana. It's a nice song isn't it? Dengan cerita Ruben or his Islam name Abu Bakr, really drop down a tears. And something hit me right that moment, kenapa orang yang bukan Islam tu punyalah berusaha buat research segala nak mencari sesuatu yang boleh membuatkan diorang ni bangun setiap pagi and know exactly who they lived for? why are they even here? what's this life about? WHAT'S THE PURPOSE OF LIFE? Tetiber datang dalam pandangan aku yang aku ni, I already have all the answer to those questions but still I'm ignoring the most idea of it. Ya, kita sembahyang setiap waktu and we abide by some rules given to us but still there are some rules yang kita berat na...

So, finally i cast away the big ego and make it up to someone i should say i treasure most ... Although it is hard to actually forget something that miserably happened between us it's just come to my sense i'm the only one who actually notice the flaws ... The same pressure cause me misery in my day to day life until i truly move on and let go the big ego and just take us as only friend ... JUST FRIEND ... My Best Friend for opposite gender! Sorry, for not contacting you in anyway ... Try to stabilize my feeling towards you, haha ... =p I'm done...and i'm think i'm okay now =D

I don't know where to begin Fighting a war I can't win Fighting a memory Something that use to be Hurmmm No matter how hard I fight All of my strength and my might Keeps defeating me It just keeps defeating me Urrmmm So what I'm trying to say I know what's happening Your body is here with me But your heart and your mind is still with her Go back to what you know Go back to where you know your heart is boy Just be honest (This is impossible) This is impossible We'll never work cause you don't want it babe You belong with her so go back to what you know Telling me things of you two Killing me when she was with you And how she was oh so sweet The way that she use to treat you (Seems you just can't) Keep her out of your mind Obvious to me that I'm Not where you want to be Baby you don't want me No no So what I'm trying to say I know whats happening Your body is here with me But your heart and your mind is still with her GO BACK TO WHAT YOU KNOW! And ...

J'veux ton amour Et je veux ton revenge J'veux ton amour I don't wanna be friends it means I want your love and I want your revenge I want your love I don't want to be friends Perasaan untuk melepaskan sangat sukar ... TIDAK DINAFIKAN but for someone yang less important, it's so damn easy but how about those yang soooo dear to our heart??? Akan hadirlah cerita2 kisah hidup yang dulu yang without we realizing it we bring it forward with us ... Ain't we suppose to leave it behind??? Ada yang cakap untuk pengajaran tapi kalau dah terlalu detail kite membawa sekali kisah2 silam itu bersama2 - Entahlah, i dun feel like we really2 moved on and let it pass us. I take me as an example - Dalam tak sedar, sometimes it feels like I'm doing certain thing to show 'him' I'm so moved on tapi bila cerita dekat one of my friend - "No, u don't ... kalau ko dah lupa, ko tak perlu nak menunjuk2 dekat dia." Itulah responnya ... Tapi ya ke??? A litt...

We are the lucky ones We shine like a thousand suns When all of the colour runs together I'll keep you company In one glorious harmony Waltzing with destiny forever Dance me into the night Underneath the moon shining so bright Turning me into the light Time dances whirling past I gaze through the looking glass And feel just beyond my grasp is heaven Sacred geometry Where movement is poetry Visions of you and me forever Dance me into the night Underneath the moon shining so bright Turning me into the light Dance me into the night Underneath the moon shining so bright Let the dark waltz begin Oh let me wheel - let me spin Let it take me again Turning me into the light p/s : Song sang by Hayley Westenra

i know that its late and maybe i shouldn't be so into you its just that tonight i'm so taken i've fallen for you when i look in your eyes i can see a million possibilities and i know you'll be leaving me soon but tonight.... come a little bit closer let me hold you baby i will be good to you and we can try to forget tomorrow make it last forever tonight So if you must go know that i'll be missing you, wishing you closer so lets make the most of this moment together we never forget and its breaking my heart cause i know that tomorrow you'll be miles away and i catch myself wanting so much more tonight...come closer So if you leaving me now baby i don't know how i will ever get over you because you open my eyes to this love that's inside oh,baby,baby don't ever leave me.... p/s: glad to know i'm missing someone =D

....and so the rose grows a lot more of its thorn so no one can ever touch it!

Have come to my sense where i should not compare the one who love me most and someone i just get pass by sometimes Have come to my sense in moving on there is never a looking back to the past memories that should be burn into ashes Have come to my sense when i have not yet enough confidence in sense of loving the one who truly love me I should not pretend to even be in love Have come to my sense when i walk a million miles and had those insecurity feeling the one who truly love me will stand there to protect not some passer by Have come to my sense the word eternity never means end to the one who truly love you but it does to some passer by interpret as only a joke Have come to my sense appreciate the love in front is worth than take a risk of short introduction to some passer by and fall to the ground Sometimes in life we not always get what we want but we have to learn to accept what's already meant to be ours and appreciate it... You can only feel true lo...

My heart rhyme to this song unexpectedly Come on hold my hand, I wanna contact the living. Not sure I understand, This role I've been given. I sit and talk to god And he just laughs at my plans, My head speaks a language, I don't understand. (chorus) I just wanna feel real love, Feel the home that I live in. cause I got too much life, Running through my veins, going to waste. I don't wanna die, But I ain't keen on living either. Before I fall in love, I'm preparing to leave him. I scare myself to death, That's why I keep on running. Before I've arrived, I can see myself coming. (chorus) I just wanna feel real love, Feel the home that I live in. cause I got too much life, Running through my veins, going to waste. And I need to feel, real love And a life ever after. I cannot get enough. (instrumental) (chorus) I just wanna feel real love, Feel the home that I live in, I got too much love, Running through my veins, going to waste. I just wanna feel real love, I...

Semalam yang sangat emosi...Tiba-tiba je aku menangis sebab terkenangkan sesuatu dan terfikirkan sesuatu...How they juz so damn easy to say those words and never really feel anything at all...Kawan aku call pun aku tak boleh nak cakap, kesian dia terpaksa call arinilah kalau nak diikutkan...Cuak jugak dia tetiber dengar suara aku cam2... Rasa lelah, rasa dah penat hidup pun sama...am I ready to go? Leaving this world...Akan aman ke aku kat sana? Dalam hati, "Beranganlah aisya oiii, macamla baik sangat nak mendapat ketenangan kat sana!" Susah jadi perempuan....itulah yang aku fikir sekarang...yeah,yeah aku tau perempuan senang dapat pahala tapi jangan dilupakan dia gak punca besar kepada dosa kaum yang lagi satu...Macam mana nak ubah perangai diri sendiri? Aku berborak dengan one of the kakak dekat sini...Dia very muslimah jauh beza dengan aku....She's 45 and still single...Aku bercerita dekat dia pasal abg aku datang bawak hadiah baju t-shirt muslimah untuk aku...Baju tu ...

Tattoo your name across my heart... So it will remain... Not even death can make us part...

...hit my heart hard... ...and it so damn scary

There will be no end for : A day without thinking of you A day without hoping on stalking on you A day without have this in mind....say it!!! For I think you have found the key to my heart

If I beg and if I cry Would it change the sky tonight? Will it give me sunlight? Should I wait for you to call? Is there any hope at all? Are you drifting by... When I think about it I know that I was never held or even cared The more I think about it The less that I was able to share with you I try to reach you, I can almost feel you You're nearly here And then you disappear (Disappear, disappear, disappear) You disappear (Disappear, disappear, disappear) And then I lie all by myself I see your face, I hear your voice My heart stays faithful And time has come and time has passed If its good it's got to last It feels so right When I think about it I know that I was never held or even cared The more I think about it The less that I was able to share with you I try to reach for you, I can almost feel you You're nearly here And then you disappear (Disappear, disappear, disappear) You disappear (Disappear, disappear, disappear) You, you disappear I missed all the signs, one at ...